You're obsessed with your hair, your car, and your clothes
no...

You want to marry a Korean American or Chinese American woman (males); or you want to marry a white guy (females).
no... lol korean fobs are really hott

You know that Camp doesn't mean a cabin in the woods.
yeah

Your Issei grandparents had an arranged marriage.
no

One of your relatives was a "picture bride."
no!

You have relatives who live in Hawaii.
heck yes!

You belong to a Japanese credit union
no

Wherever you live now, you always come home to the Obon festival.
yepp!

The bushes in your front yard are trimmed into balls.
no

You have a kaki tree in the backyard.
yess. oishii

You have at least one bag of sembei in the house at all times.
yep, the sembei mix... u know, the ones with the spicy dried peas?

You have a Japanese doll in a glass case in your living room.
yeah

You have a nekko cat in your house for good luck.
yeah

You have large Japanese platters in your china cabinet.
yes

You have the family mon and Japanese needlepoint on the wall.
lolol yeah.. we had to make clay family mon's in japanese school a long time ago

You own a multicolored lime green polyester patchwork quilt.
uhh no?

Your grandma used to crochet all your blankets, potholders and dishtowels.
yes. lol

You check to see if you need to take off your shoes at your friends' houses.
yeah....

When you visit other Japanese, you give or receive a bag of fruits or vegetables.
yeah

When you visit other Japanese, you know that you should bring omiage.
duh

When you leave a Japanese person's house, you take leftover food home on a paper plate or a Styrofoam meat tray.
ha yeah

You keep a supply of rubber bands, twist ties, butter and tofu containers in the kitchen.
yeahhh... didnt know the whole container of rubber bands was a japanese thing... i thought my family was just weird...

You know that Pat Morita doesn't really speak like Mr. Miyagi.
--

You're mad because Kristi Yamaguchi should have gotten more commercial endorsements than Nancy Kerrigan.
not really.. i dont watch ice skating..but i bet my parents believe in that

When your back is sore, you use Tiger Balm or that flexi-stick with the rubber ball on the end that goes, "katonk," "katonk."
haha not me, but my parents

After funerals, you go for Chinameshi.
no?

After giving koden, you get stamps in the mail.
ive never gotten stamps after koden

You fight fiercely for the check after dinner.
wow, that describes my parents

You've hidden money in the pocket of the person who paid for dinner.
again, my parents

You don't need to read the instructions on the proper use of hashi.
yeah....

You eat soba on New Year's Eve.
ick yes...

You start off the new year with a bowl of ozoni for good luck and the mochi sticks to the roof of your mouth.
ozoni is deliciouss

You pack bento for road trips.
sometimes

Your grandma made the best sushi in town.
no way, i do! jk

You cut all your carrots and hot dogs at an angle.
no...

You know the virtues of SPAM.
YUM! supamu musubi!

You know what it means to eat "footballs."
ha

You grew up eating ambrosia, wontons and finger Jell-O at family potlucks.
no since wen are wontons japanese

You always use Best Foods mayonnaise and like to mix it with shoyu to dip broccoli.
shoyu mayonaise!

You use the "finger method" to measure the water for your rice cooker.
yeah, i think a lot of other asian races do that too though

You grew up on rice: bacon fried rice, chili rice, curry rice or red rice.
rice. every day. to this day.

You like to eat rice with your spaghetti.
no

You can't start eating until you have a bowl of rice.
.... .... lol

Along with salt and pepper, you have a shoyu dispenser at your table.
yep

You buy rice 25 pounds at a time and shoyu a gallon at a time.
lol of course

Natto: you either love it or hate it.
again, of course... personallyi think its NASTY! but everyone in my family loves it....

As a kid, you used to eat Botan rice candy.
still do

You have a pet named Chibi or Shiro.
shiro! nah not really i just want to name my pet that.

someone you know, owns an Akita or Shiba dog.
yeahhh

At school, you had those Hello Kitty pencil boxes and sweet smelling erasers.
fobby!

Milk makes you queasy and alcohol turns your face red.
hahah alcohol

Your dad owns a Member's Only jacket.
??

Someone you know drives an Acura Integra, Honda Accord or Toyota Camry.
toyotaaa

You used to own one of those miniature zori keychains
hai

You have a kaeru frog or good luck charm hanging in your car.
actually i have the frogs in my purse

Your parents compare you to their friends' kids.
uh my gma does

Your dentist, doctor and optometrist is Japanese American.
optometrist

Whenever you're with more than three people, it takes an hour to decide where to eat.
yeah

You've heard your name pronounced a half-dozen different ways.
SOO true...

You know that E.O. 9066 isn't a zip code.
yes. so sad... pppl dont even know the about the internment camps..

In the bathroom you have a crocheted toilet paper cover.
no..

You know the California Hotel is not located in California.
no comment

No matter how bad your Japanese is, you still know the words shi-shi and oon-chi.
hahah the first one

You have, at one time or another, helped fold 1,000 cranes for someone's wedding or anniversary.
Yah!

When you meet another JA, you can be sure you're either related to them or know someone who knows them.
duh every japanese knows a japanese at my school

You have one of those "always hot" rice cookers in your kitchen.
yeah

You were told to eat nori so your hair would be black.
what??

You say "itadakimasu" before you eat.
hai, saa doozo!

You know to stop yelling when you hear the word "yakamashii."
my mom says that a lot

You compliment a person from Japan on how well they speak English, and they compliment you on how well you speak Japanese, and you both know you're kind of stretching things.
um protocol..

You know you don't need a spoon for miso soup.
yeah

The ultimate Chinese dinner for you includes: seaweed soup, chicken chow mein, chashu, pakkai, shrimp with lobster sauce, almond duck, pea chow yuk and homyu.
no

You know that summer means it's time for somen and shaved ice with azuki beans.
shaved ice

Your dad's front lawn is his pride and joy - to the point of obsession.
no

You're proud to be Japanese - and you pass these jokes on to all your Japanese friends!
yay japanese pride! hahah im so fobby yet whitewashed... i have both kinds of friends...